Hello,
First off, I realize you could be doing anything right now and you're here, reading this, and I appreciate that.
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Now, let's jump into talking about booze, or the lack there of. I must include the disclaimer that while these tips can be helpful in steering clear of alcohol, they are not designed to be suggestions for anyone dealing with alcohol addiction. Addiction is a disease and should be treated by a medical doctor. These tips are meant for those of you who are participating in Sober October, gearing up for Dry January, or who simply want to cut back or give the sober lifestyle a try.
Let's first acknowledge the reason that many of us drink socially or recreationally. Alcohol is used to comfort us in times of sadness, amplify times of celebration, and quell nerves in times of stress. It can be a social lubricant and a dose of bravery. It's so deeply engrained in our society it seems everyone is doing it for any and all occasions (or for no occasion at all).
According to the 2023 National Survey on Drug Use and Health (NSDUH), 224.3 million people ages 12 and older (79.1% in this age group) reported that they drank alcohol at some point in their lifetime.1,2 This includes:
111.1 million males ages 12 and older
113.2 million females ages 12 and older
That's a lot of people! With numbers like that, it's hard to believe that sobriety is trending, especially since we saw such a spike in alcohol sales during the pandemic, but a 2023 Gallup research report states the rate of over drinking, at least among all 18- to 34-year-olds is now 13%, down from 21% in 2001-2003.
I'm willing to bet you know at least one person who has decided to give up drinking either temporarily or for good. Not saying you should, but if you'd like to join them, here are some tips for staving off the urge to grab a drink.
What do I do with my hands?
Perhaps you find it awkward not to drink in social situations mostly because you don't know what to do with your hands!
Tip #1: It may seem obvious, but find something else to hold.
If you're used to feeling cool and confident holding a beverage, try replacing it with a clutch. They're super chic and unlike your beverage they can carry everything you need. I love this and this from Cult Gaia.
If carrying a clutch isn't your thing, you might try ordering a mocktail. It seems like low hanging fruit, but I've seen many a person succumb to pressure and order beer, wine, or spirits instead of opting for a beautiful NA beverage. They're getting good at making NA drinks! Try it, trust me.
What if I have social anxiety?
Here's the truth: alcohol is not the only substance that so called "helps" ease anxiety related to being in social settings. Kanna, for example, is a great alternative. People report feeling more bubbly and conversational, and because of its empathogenic nature, find it more easy to connect with and relate to others.
Tip #2: Toss a bottle of Sidekick in your bag or pocket and enjoy yourself with a different kind of buzz.
What if I'm the only sober one in my friend group?
Peer pressure is very real, and everybody handles it differently. If you're doing a temporary stint like Sober October or Dry January, you might consider removing yourself from situations where you know you'll be pressured to drink for a couple weeks.
If you are committed to a living a sober lifestyle, it's really helpful to have a sober companion, either somebody making the transition with you, or someone who has already been sober for a while and can help keep you honest and accountable. Know that it's okay to lose a few superfluous friends along the way when you're becoming sober.
My social life revolves around drinking
You're not alone! Drinking is woven into the way we socialize, and it can feel awkward and isolating trying to avoid it.
Tip #3: Here's an obvious one: stay out of bars.
It can be tough if that's where your friends meet to catch up, your coworkers are always suggesting happy hours after work, or you're in the dating world and meeting for a drink is the go-to.
Try suggesting to that you and your friends pick a regular work out class and meet there at the same time every week instead of the bar.
If your coworkers are always pushing happy hour, perhaps you opt out? It sounds harsh, I know, but people who hang out at happy hours every day after work have nothing better to do. To each their own, but think of all the ways you could spend those after-work hours. You could pursue a hobby, pick up a side hustle, take your dog to the park, apply for new jobs that don't revolve around a drinking culture, cook a proper dinner, and so on. Speaking from experience, happy hours have never left me with deeply meaningful, life-long relationships. If you're 25 and think you are making friends for life, give it 10 years and see if you still talk with those people you feel pressured to happy hour with.
As for the dating scenario, challenge yourself and the other person to be a bit more creative when it comes to date ideas! If all they've got is "let's meet for a drink," then perhaps they aren't all that interesting.
Tip #4: Don't be afraid to trim the fat
They say misery loves company, and so do drinkers. It's common for "drinking buddies" to fall away as you progress in your journey towards sober living. That's okay. If a sober life is what you want, then stay the course. The people who truly support you will stick by you. They will not pressure you or tease you. They will be thrilled for you.
You never know, your conviction might even inspire change in some of them.
Thank you for reading ˚‧｡⋆🌻⋆｡‧˚
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